In 1970 I graduated from primary school to what was then called a ‘secondary modern’. Unlike the rest of the UK, Surrey had yet to switch to comprehensive schools. I had a weird form of dyslexia and couldn’t pass the exam to get into a grammar school.

On day one, a senior teacher gave us what can only be described as a demotivational speech:

“You’re all too stupid to get into a real school, so you are here for five years. If you work hard, you’ll get a factory job. If you do some work, you’ll sweep the streets. The rest of you will go to prison”.

I’m not kidding. This was my first day at the big school. I was 11 years old.